雅思写作提升的必经之路-细化思维
消除语法错误,基本上能保证你的雅思大作文到6分,可是6分以后的雅思写作之路,就开始了更艰难的旅程。因为要解决另外一个很核心的问题,就是细化思维的问题。通过细化思维来将题目进行有逻辑的流畅展开,并且的确是展开话题用的,是写作得分的关键。
当考官看到类似,万能开头:With the development of...的时候,想必一定会皱眉头。 “也许只有中国人会用吧。那为什么像类似的开篇:with the development of society and economy, there are more and more//increasing number of //, the topic is a hotly-debated one, which arose our passion towards the…, 然后再写一波大的背景,然后开始写作文切入的话题,这种思路严重破坏了雅思作文的评分标准(CC) 连贯性的问题。所以作文的开篇就必须要是直接切入话题(通过细化思维的描述,然后表明自己的观点即可。)
中文追求高语境文化容易宏观化一些概念,也就是很大很空的话,类似于“新闻联播”的发言稿。高中的作文的时候,写的越大,不接地气,越云里雾里的文章,越能拿高分。这些华丽的躯壳并没有严谨的逻辑。所以细化思维的训练是非常重要的训练,这个也可以从很多剑桥雅思后面的范文中可以看到。
所以英文写作一定要细,要写清楚。有多细呢?我举个例子。比如一篇金钱和幸福的关系,优秀的英文逻辑就是:“有了钱我可以买车,有了车生活会更方便,生活方便了我的幸福指数就会提高。”无懈可击的逻辑,perfect!然而中国人有可能会这样写:"Being rich could boost one's materialistic happiness. Moreover, it could..."语法单词基本都没问题,但是写了等于没写。。。什么是materialistic happiness?我们都知道中文是物质幸福,看似也很高大上。然而西方人的人脑回路是无法直接get到的。。你必须要clarify it。这些所谓很好并且很复杂的想法并不足以说清楚这些观点。所以大家要记得要将自己的理性和智商同步下降,这样才能达到英国人的水平和高度。
举例说明如下:
细化思维的训练中文擅长把一个抽象的问题变得更抽象,以大见更大;英文擅长把一个抽象的问题变得具体化
例子一: Today, the high sales of popular consumer goods reflect the power of advertising and not the real needs of the society in which they are sold. To what extent do you agree or disagree? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
4.5分的思维: Nowdays (竟然有人少写了个 a) ,with society develops, advertisements plays a more and more important role in modern society.
5.5分的思维: Nowadays, with the development of society and economy, advertisements play a more and more important role in modern society. Some people said they are helpful to give us much information while others do not think so. From my perspective, I think ….
6.5分的思维: Nowadays, there are lots of advertisements on television or on the streets. While someone doubt the usefulness and value of advertisements, I still believe it is a positive trend with overt benefits.
7.5分的思维: Nowadays, there are lots of advertisements on television or on the billboards. Some people think that the advertising boosts the sales of goods and it encourages people to buy things unnecessarily. These arguments may be true. In my country, many advertising companies produce advertisements with famous and popular actors or singers. People, especially youngsters, buy goods that their favorite singer advertise, although they do not really need the products.
8.5分的思维: Nowadays, no matter where you get around in a city or even in the countryside, it is pretty easy for you to find one or two billboards introducing products in the streets. Some people think that advertising boosts the sales of goods and encourages people to buy things they do not necessarily need. This argument contains some truth. In my country, advertising companies often produce advertisements featuring popular actors or singers to induce people, especially youngsters, to acquire goods which their favorite actor or singer seems to endorse, whether they need the products or not..
细化训练(例子二) In some countries young people are encouraged to work or travel for a year between finishing high school and starting university studies. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages for young people who decide to do this.
4.5---5 分的思维
It is a well-acknowledged that studying is not easy. Along with many benefits also comes negative aspects. We should look at both side before reaching a conclusion about whether working a year bring more benefits or more problems.
5.5—6分的思维
Nowadays, the ways to educate the youth become increasingly significant in such a competitive society. The opinion that teenagers could have a year free from school for traveling and work arouse a heated debate. Although there are both pros and cons for the question, ,my view is that teenagers who are 10 something to 20 something could have their own choice to decide where to learn and how to learn.
6分的思维
It is hard for young people to make the decision on whether they should work or travel before starting university studies. Some consider it is an excellent chance for them to practice themselves while others believe that it will produce adverse effects on their life.
6.5-7分的思维
Thanks to the gap year, nowadays high school graduates can be highly praised by their strong abilities. While many young people are in favor of the attempt, older generation tends to hold conservative attitudes. Personally, I believe different types of media have their respective merits.
It is quite common these days for young people in many countries to have a break from studying after graduating from high school. The trend is not restricted to rich students who have the money to travel, but is also evident among poorer students who choose to work and become economically independent for a period of time.
本源转载自知乎,原作者李威廉老师,如有任何版权问题,请联系英语作文大全修改或删除。
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