My broken heart in the first secret love
When I entered my high school, being assigned to sit beside the window, I met the boy who acted the leading role in my secret love scene.
He sat beside me. He is certainly a smart boy. His talent in learning and stable behavior seems absolutely attractive to some girls. Unfortunately, I was one of the victims for his charm.
It was the first time for me to like a boy. Maybe somebody think I am joking for it was too late to think of love, but it is true. During the times we sat together I always performed proud and cool before him as if he was the air in the atmosphere. He was smart but a little shy boy and inward. He spoke little all day and seldom smiled.
Time flied. I and he were apart the next semester. He sat in the last row of the classroom while I was sitting in the mid row and in another line. But I could not help missing him though I still acted cool and rarely spoke to him, so I did ridiculous thing to see him after classes. It is to go to the washing room. So I went out through the hind door to the toilet every rest between classes. It was too stupid, was not it？ I tried to be outstanding when he was present and spoke radical words about things to attract his attention. All I thought that time was getting his attention.
As I referred above, I was only one of the victims and was a timid girl inside my heart. But a pretty girl was fascinated by him too. （When I think of it now, I admire her very much.） She was much braver than I was. ？ She began to ask him questions and discuss problems with him more and more often. At the end of the second semester in my high school's life, I lost the right to love him―he was another one's boyfriend.
My heart broke when I saw them walking hand in hand at night on the grassy playground of our school. I could not hear what friends beside me said. I was definitely deaf at such time. I lost myself then. What I could think was nothing.
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