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Croquet With the Queen

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    The prettiest flowers in the garden were the roses. There were some on a small tree. Alice stopped to look at them. They were white roses, but three gardeners were working hard, trying to make them red.

    "Why are they doing that?" Alice wondered. She went near them.

    "Please can you tell me," she asked, "why you are making those roses red?"

    The three gardeners looked very unhappy.

    "You tell her. Seven," one of them said.

    "No," said Seven, "you tell her. Five."

    But Five said, "No, you tell her. Two."

    Two looked even more unhappy. but he began. Well. Miss, this-er-this-er-tree should be a red rose tree. If the Queen sees white roses on it, she'll-er-she'll have our heads cut off. So we're trying to make them red before she comes to-er――"

    Five was looking across the garden, and just then he cried out, "The Queen! The Queen!"

    At once the three gardeners threw themselves down with their faces on the ground.

    Alice heard a great noise. "Now I shall see the Queen!" she thought.

    It was a procession. Ten soldiers came in front of all the others. They were like the gardeners, but they had clubs . Then Alice saw ten of the King's own men with red diamonds on them. The children of the King and Queen came next, all with red hearts . After them there were the people who had come to play croquet. Most of them were kings and queens, but Alice saw that one of them was the White Rabbit, not looking at all happy. The Knave of Hearts came next, "just in front of the King and Queen of Hearts themselves.

    " Should I lie on my face like the gardeners?" Alice wondered. "But what is a procession for if nobody looks at it?" So she stood and waited.

    When the procession came to Alice, they all stopped and looked at her. The Queen said to the Knave of Hearts. "Who is this?"

    The, Knave of Hearts did not know, so he said nothing.

    " Fool!" the Queen shouted. Then she spoke to Alice. "What's you name, child?"

    "My name is Alice, if you please." And Alice wondered if that was the way to speak to a queen. "But they're only a pack of cards," she told herself. "I'm not going to be afraid of them."

    The Queen looked at the tree gardeners who were on their faces round the rose tree. She could not see who they were because their backs were the same as the backs of all the others: the same as three soldiers; or three of the King's own men; or even three of her own children.

    "Who are these?" the Queen asked.

    "Don't ask me! Why should I know?" said Alice. … "That was very brave of me," she thought.

    The Queen's face became very red. She was very, very angry. She looked at Alice and shouted: "Off with her head! Off――"

    "Nonsense!" said Alice.

    The Queen did not know what to do. The King put his hand on his wife's arm and said, "Don't be angry, my dear. She's only a child."

    She moved her arm away angrily. " Show me their faces," she said to the Knave.

    The Knave moved the gardeners with his foot.

    " Get up!" the Queen shouted, and they stood up, very much afraid, and saying nothing.

    " What," the Queen asked, " have you been doing?"

    "If you please," began Two, " we-er-we were trying――"

    "I see!" said the Queen. She had been looking at the roses. "Off with their heads!"

    The procession moved on, but three soldiers stayed to cut the gardeners' heads off. The gardeners ran to Alice for help, and she put them into a big flower pot. "Don't be afraid," she said. "They will not cut your heads off."

    The soldiers looked round the garden for some time. Then they went after the procession.

    "Are their heads off?" the Queen shouted.

    " Their heads have gone, if you please," they shouted back.

    " Good!" shouted the Queen. " Can you play croquet?"

    The soldiers said nothing, but they looked at Alice. The question was for her.

    "Yes," Alice called out.

    " Come on, then!" the Queen cried, and Alice went and look her place in the procession.

    "What will happen next?" she wondered.

    "It's-it's a nice day, isn't it?" she heard.

    The White Rabbit was beside her. He was looking at her face to see if she was angry with him.

    "Yes, a very nice day," Alice said. "Where's the Duchess?"

    "Sh!" The Rabbit looked all round him quickly. Then he put his mouth near to Alice's ear and said: "She's going to have her head cut off."

    "Is she? Why?" Alice said.

    "Did you say, "I shall cry'?" the Rabbit asked.

    "No, I didn't. I shall not cry. I said, "Why?"

    "She hit the Queen――" the Rabbit began.

    "Oh, good!" Alice said.

    "Sh!" the Rabbit said again. (Alice could see that he was afraid.) 'The Queen will hear you. She hears everything. The Duchess came late, and the Queen said――"

    " Go to your places!" shouted the Queen, and people began to run about everywhere. They ran into other people and fell down. Alice could see that they were all afraid of the Queen. But after a time they were ready, and the game began.

    This croquet was not the game Alice knew. At home people hit a ball with a wooden 'mallet' to send it over the grass. Here somebody gave her a flamingo to hit a hedgehog. Some of the ground was grassy, and some was not.

    When her flamingo was ready to hit the hedgehog, the hedgehog walked away. When the hedgehog was a ball again, the flamingo put its head up and looked at her. "It's a very hard game," Alice thought.

    The game was hard for everybody, and the Queen was becoming angrier and angrier. She went round shouting "Off with his head!" or "Off with her head!"

    Alice didn't see any heads being cut off, but she was not happy. "The Queen isn't angry with me just now," she thought, "but it can happen at any time. I would like to speak to somebody about it."

    There was something in the air near her. "I wonder what it is," she said. And then she saw that it was a grin. "It's the Cheshire Cat," she thought.

    "Now I shall have somebody to speak to."

    As soon as its mouth was all there, the Cheshire Cat said, "How are you? Are you happy?"

    Alice waited. When she could see its eyes, she shook her head. "I can't speak to it," she thought, "before it has some ears ―― or perhaps one ear."

    Soon she could see its head, with the ears, and, Alice said, "I don't like the game at all. It isn't a good game."

    The Cat did not show any more of itself. Its head stayed in the air without a body. "How do you like the Queen?" it asked.

    " I don't," said Alice. She saw that the Queen was very near, and she added "-think――l don't think that there is any queen like her."

    The Queen was pleased, and moved away. But the King came to Alice and stood by her, looking at the Cat's head and wondering. "Who are you speaking to?" he asked Alice.

    "It's a friend of mine," Alice said, "a Cheshire cat."

    I don't like the look of it at all," said the King, "but it may kiss my hand, if it likes."

    "I don't want to." the Cat said.

    The King was angry, but he was afraid too. "Don't look at me like that," he said to the Cat, and he stood on the other side of Alice.

    Alice said, "A cat may look at a king. I read that in a book, I think."

    "Well, it must go," the King said, and he called to the Queen. "This cat must go, my dear, mustn't it?"

    The Queen did not even look. " Off with his head!" she shouted.

    "I'll get the axeman myself," the King said, and he went away quickly.

    Just then, Alice lost her flamingo. It tried to fly up into a tree, and she could not catch it for some time.

    When Alice got back to the Cheshire Cat, there were a lot of people round it. The King and the Queen and the axeman were all speaking at the same time.

    The axeman was saying: "I can't cut a head off it there isn't a body to cut it off."

    The King was saying: "Nonsense! If anything has a head, its head can be cut off."

    The Queen was saying: "If somebody doesn't do something soon, I'll have everybody's head cut off."

    As soon as Alice came, they all asked her about it. Alice thought, and then she said, " It's the Duchess's cat. Ask her about it."

    "Bring the Duchess here," the Queen said. "She's waiting to have her head cut off."

    The axeman ran to get the Duchess. and the Cheshire Cat's head began to disappear. Even its grin had disappeared by the time the Duchess came. The King and the axeman ran about, trying to find it, but the Queen told all the others to go back to the game.

    "Come for a walk," the Duchess said, and she put her arm through Alice's arm. "I'm very glad to see you again." And they walked away.

    Alice heard the Queen at the croquet ground. She was still shouting 'Off with his head!" and 'Off with her head!" as she got angry with the players.

    "You must be glad to be alive." Alice said to the Duchess.

    "Yes," the Duchess said. "It's a nice day."

    "Will they still cut your head off?"

    "Oh, no! They never cut anybody's head off. The Queen likes to say it, but nobody does it."

    Alice wanted to ask some more questions, but they heard a cry of 'The trial's beginning!"

    " What trial is it?" Alice tried to ask, but the Duchess was running too quickly to answer. As she still had Alice's arm, Alice ran too.

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