雅思写作高分范文赏析：购物中心还是公共设施？

Task：When new towns are planned, it is important to build more public parks or sports facilities than shopping centers for people to spend their free time. To what extent do you agree or disagree? (2016/04/16)

考官零距离：48篇9分大小作文考官范文解读与下载

解析：

这是非常古老的一个作文题目。问题的核心是：在城里，到底该多规划建设公园或者运动场，还是多建设购物中心?很显然，两者都有利有弊。公园或运动场方便大家休闲，运动，从而有利于身体健康，同时有利于城市的安静和安全;购物中心则方便大家购物和闲逛，但会让城市显得非常拥挤。在老雅看来，因为现在很多家庭都有汽车，因此最好将购物中心建在城市之外，城里则应该建更多公园或运动场。解题关键是认识到，在城外建购物中心，不会影响到人们的正常生活，而如果城里有太多购物中心，会影响到生活的方方面面。

When a new town is planned, there is always a problem to solve: whether should they build more public parks or sports facilities or more shopping centers? Although more shopping malls may provide conveniences for those shoppers, I believe building more public facilities is a far better choice.

老师笔记：

开头提出一个问题：城市规划的时候到底该多建公共设施还是购物中心;并提出自己的观点，该多建设公共设施。

More public facilities help people to live a more satisfying life. With a public park nearby, even the laziest person will go outdoors and breathe the fresh air there. People can take a walk in the park together with their family members, chatting and having a lot of fun. This is of course much beneficial to their health than staying at home, sitting in front of TV or a computer like a sofa potato. At the same time, when people are enjoying their time in the park or the sports field, the town or city will become a lot more peace and quiet.

老师笔记：

(1) 本段论述建设公共设施的好处是为人提供更满意的生活。由以下两个方面的好处：其一是能督促人出门活动和呼吸新鲜空气，比起呆在家里对人们健康更有益。其二是人们有地方享受和消磨时间，使得生活更安静和平。

(2) chatting and having a lot of fun表示伴随，边散步，边聊天玩乐。

(3) be beneficial to 对…有益

However, if there are more shopping centres than parks in the town or city, it will become much more crowded, noisy and dirty. When the street is lined with all kinds of stores, there will benumerous vehicles coming and going, and when shoppers rush into these stores, they will make noiseintolerable to the city dwellers. As so many people crowd into a limited space like a shopping centre, the safety problem may also arise. Some people may argue that, despite all these problems, more shopping centres will benefit people by saving their shopping time. This argument does not hold much water, however. On the one hand, having to push your way through throngs of people when shopping does not really save your time; on the other hand, as more and more families have cars, it does not really cost more time if they drive to the shopping centres built in the wider space outside of the town or city.

老师笔记：

(1) 本段论述建设购物中心的坏处，包括使交通拥挤，噪音吵闹和街道脏乱;而且由于拥挤购物中心并不真正节省时间，而且私家车使得去郊外也方便(言下之意是购物中心不应该建在城镇中而应该建在郊区)。

(2) be lined with 排列着…

(3) numerous=plentiful，用来代替many等简单表达

(4) intolerable=unendurable=hard to tolerate/endure 难以忍受的

(5) do not hold much water (观点)站不住脚

To conclude, I prefer to have more public facilities to shopping centres in a new town. A town with more public facilities is more peaceful, quiet and safer while a town with more shopping centres is noisy, crowded and therefore less desirable. My suggestion is that shopping centres be built in the suburb of the town/city where more spaces are available.

老师笔记：

结尾重申观点并总结论点。城镇中需要公共设施，会更加和平、安静和安全;而有购物中心则吵闹而拥挤，因此购物中心应当建在空闲的郊区。

参考译文：

当一座新的小城正在规划时，总有一个问题需要解决：到底该多规划建设公园或者运动场，还是多建设购物中心?尽管更多的购物中心可能会为购物者提供更多的便利，我相信建设更多公共设施是更好的选择。

更多的公共设施能帮助人们过上更令人满意的生活。周围如果有公园，即使是最懒惰的人也会出门活动，呼吸新鲜空气。人们可以在公园里和家庭成员一起散步，聊天，玩乐。比起呆在家里、像沙发土豆那样坐在电视机或是电脑面前，这当然对他们的健康十分有益。同时，当人们在公园或运动场享受自己的时间，乡镇或城市将会变得更安静和平。

然而，城镇中若有过多的购物中心，将会变得十分拥挤、吵闹、脏乱。当街道上排列着各种商店时，将有数量庞大的车辆来来往往。当购物者一拥而上挤进商店时，他们将会发出城市居民难以忍受的噪音。当过多的人挤进如购物中心那样有限的空间时，安全问题也会出现。有些人可能会争论虽然有这些问题，购物中心将会节省人们的购物时间，使他们从中获益。然而这样的观点并不十分合理。一方面，购物时必须在人群中挤来挤去并不真正节省你的时间。另一方面，越来越多的人有了汽车，开车前往建在郊外更广阔空间的购物中心并花不了他们多少时间。

总的来说，我更喜欢在新兴的城镇有更多的公共设施而不是购物中心。有更多的公共设施的新城镇将会更加和平、安静和安全，而有更多购物中心的乡镇则吵闹而拥挤，因此并不那么可取。我的建议是购物中心应当建在郊区，那里有更多空闲的空间。

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