Musician jokes
Q： How many musicians does it take to change a light bulb？
A： Twenty. 1 to do it and the other 19 to stand around and say， "I can do that！"
Q： What do you get if Bach falls off a horse， but has the courage to get on again and continue riding？
A： Bach in the saddle again.
Q： How many bluegrass musicians does it take to screw in a light bulb？
A： Two. One to screw it in， and one to complain that it's electrified.
Q： How many musicians does it take to change a light bulb？
A： Twenty. 1 to hold the bulb， 2 to turn the ladder， and 17 to be on the guest list.
Q： How many folk musicians does it take to change a light bulb？
A： Seven； one to change and the other six to sing about how good the old one was.
Q： Why don't they know where Mozart is buried？
A： Because he's Haydn！
Q： What's musical and handy in a supermarket？
A： A Chopin Liszt.
Q： What do you get if Bach dies and is reincarnated as twins？
A： A pair of Re-bachs.
Q： What do you call a male quartet？
A： Three men and a tenor.
Where are we？
Fritz Kriesler and Rachmaninov had a recital in Carnegie Hall once. In the middle of the music， Kriesler got lost and turned around to ask Rachmaninov， "Where are we？"
Rachmaninov said， "Carnegie Hall， sir！"
What's that sound？
A tourist is sightseeing in a European city. She comes upon the tomb of Beethoven， and begins reading the commerative plaque， only to be distracted by a low scratching noise， as if something was rubbing against a piece of paper.
She collars a passing native and asks what the scratching sound is.
The local person replies， "Oh， that is Beethoven. He's decomposing."
Arriving in Heaven
Three men die and go to heaven and queue to meet St. Peter.
St. Peter： Hi， what's your name？
Paul： My name is Paul.
St. Peter： Hi， Paul. Tell me， when you died， how much were you earning？
Paul： 120K.
St. Peter： Wow！ Tell me， Paul， what were you doing to earn that kind of money？
Paul： I was a lawyer.
St. Peter： That's great. Come on in. St. Peter then turned to the second man. Hi， what's your name？
Roger： My name is Roger.
St. Peter： Hi， Roger. Tell me， when you died， how much were you earning？
Roger： 60K.
St. Peter： Hey， that's great！ Tell me， Roger：， what did you do for a living？
Roger： I was an accountant.
St. Peter： That's very good. Come on in. St. Peter then turned to the second man. Hi， what's your name？
John： My name is John.
St. Peter： Hi， John. Tell me， John， how much were you earning when you died？
John： About $23，000.
St. Peter： Hey， that's fantastic， John！ Tell me， what instrument did you play？
幽默 笑话本文地址：http://www.dioenglish.com/writing/humor/47179.html
相关文章
-
趣味图片英语笑话：snakes 蛇（双语）
Snakes... Why did it have to be snakes?蛇…为什么必须是蛇？ Medusa and Indiana Jones turned out to be one of the worst blind dates of all time美杜莎和印第安娜琼斯所有相亲中最糟糕的一次更多 英语笑...
2018-11-07 英语笑话 -
A Sense of Achievement
“Are the slimming exercises doing you any good？” a man asked his beer-bellied（啤酒肚） colleague. “Can you touch your toes now？” “No， I can't touch them，” the other replied， “but I'm beginni...
2018-12-25 英语笑话 -
I have a magical dancing duck
A circus owner walked into a bar to see everyone crowded about a table watching a little show. On the table was an upside down pot and a duck tap dancing on it. The circus owner was so impress...
2018-12-09 英语笑话 -
趣味图片英语笑话：Jerome Murphy 杰罗姆·墨菲（双语）
Write that you look like a retard ...写,你看起来像个白痴……I've posted super cute pics of the kids on Facebook and then some douchy SOB called Jerome Murphy is saying the most aw...
2018-11-07 英语笑话 -
趣味图片英语笑话：The sounds 配音（双语）
get ready, set, play, girls!准备，开始，玩，女孩们！the sounds for porn movies are often recorded later on色情电影的配音往往是后来录的 更多 英语笑话、英语小笑话、英文笑话、英语幽...
2018-11-02 英语笑话 -
Military Joke(1)
The Captain called the Sergeant in.“Sarge，I just got a telegram. Private Jones‘mother died yesterday. Better go tell him and send him in to see me.” So the Sergeant calls for his morning...
2019-01-02 英语笑话 -
英语幽默精读【86】Respones
Frequent hand-washing in my job as a medical technologist and the harsh Alaskan weather combined to give me very dry skin. One night as I prepared for bed, I rubbed my hands with petroleum jel...
2019-01-07 英语笑话 -
about proverb
the little boy did not like the look of the barking dog. "it's all right,"said a gentleman, "don't be afraid. don't you know the proverb:barking dogs don't bite?" "ah, yes,"...
2018-11-19 英语笑话 -
第74期双语笑话加练习题 不能让他跑了
A male crab met a female crab and asked her to marry him. She noticed that he was walking straight instead of sideways. Wow, she thought, this crab is really special. I can&...
2018-11-28 英语笑话
