Question / Answer Jokes(2)
There is a book called Disorder in the Court. These are things people actually said in court,word for word,taken down and now published by court reporters - who had the torment of staying calm while these exchanges were actually taking place. Some of these are excellent……
Q:What is your date of birth?
A:July fifteenth. Q:What year?
A:Every year. Q:What gear were you in at the moment of the accident?
A:Gucci sweatshirt and Reeboks.
Q:So the date of conception(of the baby)was August 8th?
A:Yes. Q:And what were you doing at that time?
Q:She had three children,right?
A:Yes. Q:How many were boys?
A:None. Q:Were there any girls?
Q:How was your first marriage terminated?
A:By death. Q:By whose death was it terminated?
Q:Can you describe the individual?
A:He was about medium height and had a beard. Q:Was this a male,or a female?
Q:Doctor,how many autopsies have you performed on dead people?
A:All my autopsies are performed on dead people.
Q:All your responses must be oral,OK?What school did you go to?
A:Oral.
Q:Do you recall the time that you examined the body?
A:The autopsy started around 8:30 p.m. Q:And Mr. Dennington was dead at the time?
A:No,he was sitting on the table wondering why I was doing an autopsy on him.
Q:What was the first thing your husband said to you when he woke up that morning?
A:He said,“Where am I,Cathy?”
Q:And why did that upset you?
A:My name is Susan.
Q:Doctor,before you performed the autopsy,did you check for a pulse?
A:No. Q:Did you check for blood pressure?
A:No. Q:Did you check for breathing?
A:No. Q:So,then it is possible that the patient was alive when you began the autopsy?
A:No. Q:How can you be so sure,Doctor?
A:Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar. Q:But could the patient have still been alive,nevertheless?
A:Yes,it is possible that he could have been alive and practicing law somewhere
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