外国最新英语幽默笑话精粹206：我解雇秘书的原因(中英)
One man explaining to another why he fired his secretary:
一个男士在向另外一个男士解释他为什么解雇了自己的秘书。
"Two Weeks ago,” I said, "was my forty一fifth birthday and I wasn’t feeling too hot that morning anyway. I went into the kitchen for breakfast knowing that my wife would be pleasant and say ` Happy Birthday' and probably have a present for me. She didn't even say ‘Good Morning' let alone say ‘Happy Birthday’.”
他说:“两星期以前是我45岁的生日，可那天早晨，我一点都不觉得兴奋。我走进厨房去吃早餐，心想妻子一定会高兴的对我说生日快乐，也许她还会为我准备了一份礼物，可她却连‘早安’都没说，就更不用说‘生日快乐’了。
"I said to myself ‘Well that’s wives for you. The children will remember.’ But the children came into breakfast and didn't say a word. And when I started to the office, I was feeling pretty low and despondent.”
当时我对自己说，这只是太太，孩子们一定会记得的，可是当孩子们进来吃早餐的时候，居然连一个词都没提。我要去上班了，心里觉得特别的失落和沮丧。
"As I walked into my office, Janet said ‘Good Morning, Boss-Happy Birthday' and I felt a little bit better that someone had remembered.”
当我走进办公室的时候，简尼特对我说:‘老板，早晨好，生日快乐’，我感到了一丝欣慰，毕竟还有人记得呀!
"I worked until noon. About noon, Janet knocked on my door and said, `You know it's such a beautiful day outside and it is your birthday, so let's go to lunch, just you and I'.” I said, "By George, that is the greatest thing I have heard all day. Let's go.”
我工作到了中午，简尼特敲开我的门说:‘你知道吗?今天外面多美啊，正巧又是你的生日，我们去吃午餐吧，就你和我。’我说:‘太棒了，这是我一天中听到的最令人兴奋的事情，那我们快走吧。’
"We went to lunch. We didn't go where we normally go. We went out into the country to a private place. We had two Martinis and enjoyed lunch tremendously.”
于是我们去吃午餐，我们没到平时去的地方，而是去了乡村一个很隐蔽的地方，我们喝了两瓶马丁尼酒，快乐地享受着午餐。
"On the way back to the office, she said, ‘You know, it's such a beautiful day we don't need to go back to the office, do we?’ I said, ‘No, I guess not.’ She said, ‘Let’s go by my apartment, and I’11 fix you another Martini.’ ”
在回办公室的路上，她说:‘你知道吗?今天是多么美好的一天啊，我们都不想回办公室对吧?’我说:‘我想是的。’她又说:‘那我们去我的家吧!我为你再开一瓶马丁尼酒。’
"We went to her apartment. We enjoyed another Martini and smoked a cigarette and she said, ‘Boss, if you don't mind, I think I'11 go into the bedroom and slip into something more comfortable’ and I allowed her as I didn't mind at all.”
于是我们来到了她的家，又喝了一瓶酒，还抽了一些香烟。她说:‘老板，如果你不介意，我想去卧室换一身舒适的衣服，’我告诉她我一点都不介意，还让她快去。
"She went into the bedroom and in about six minutes she ca
她走进卧室，大约6分钟后，走出来，拿着一个大的生日蛋糕，身后却是我的妻子和孩子们，他们齐声合唱:‘祝你生日快乐’。可这时我却是一丝不挂，只穿着一双袜子坐在那里。”
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