赖世雄读英语笑话学英语之高尚职业笑话(8)：头脑要保持冷静！(双语)
Unit 8 Keep Your Head! 头脑要保持冷静！
A young man was working in the produce section of a grocery store when a customer asked him for half a head of cabbage.
有一个年轻人在一家杂货店的农产部门工作，一天一位顾客要向他买半颗包心菜
“Sir, we don’t sell half heads of anything.”
“先生，我们东西都没有卖半颗的。”
“Well, I insist; I only want half a head.”
“哎呀，我就买半颗，我只要半颗。”
“I’ll ask the manager.”
“我 要问问经理才行。”
The young man walked to the manager’s office and, not realizing that the customer had followed him, said to the manager, “Sir, some asshole wants to buy just half a head of cabbage.”
那名年轻人走到经理的办公室，不知道那位顾客尾随着他，他对经理说道“：经理，有个浑蛋只要买半颗包心菜。”
Turing and noticing the customer, he quickly added, “And this gentleman wants the other half.”
他转身发现那名顾客，立刻又补充说：“而这位先生要买另一半。”
Later, the manager took the young man aside and said, “That was quick thinking, young fellow. We can use bright lads like you. If I hear of a higher position opening up, I’ll keep you in mind.”
稍后，经理把他拉到一旁说道“：年轻人，你反应真快。我们需要像你这么聪明的人，如果有较高的职位空缺，我会记得你的。”
Sure enough, a few weeks later the manager told the young man that an assistant manager’s spot had become vacant in the company’s store in Edmonton.
几个星期之后，经理告诉那名年轻人在艾得蒙敦分店有个襄理的职位空缺。
“Edmonton!” blurted out the young man. “Why, there’s nothing in Edmonton but hookers and hockey players!”
“艾得蒙敦！”年轻人叫了出来“，那儿有的只是妓女和曲棍球选手而已。”
“Yong man, my wife happens to come from Edmonton!”
“年轻人，我太太刚好来自艾得蒙敦！”
“No kidding, sir; what position does she play?”
“真的吗？经理，那她是打哪一个位置呢？”
英语知识点解说：
1.produce n. 农产品（集合名词，不可数）vt.生产；制造
produce section 农产部
例：You get the freshest produce at the farmer's market.
（在农民的市场上你可买到最新鲜的农产品。）
2.grocery n. 食品杂货（尤指蔬菜，常用复数）
grocery store 食品杂货店
至于另有柜台专门卖药的杂货店则为 drugstore。
3.a head of cabbage 一颗包心菜
4.insist vi. 坚持
insist on... 坚持……
例：If you always insist on having your own way, you'll never be popular.
（如果你总是坚持己见的话，将永远不会受到欢迎。）
5.take sb aside 把某人叫到一旁
例：The teacher took the naughty boy aside and gave him a stern warning.
（老师把那名顽皮的男孩子叫到一旁严重警告他。）
6.bright a. 光明的；聪明的（=clever）
look on the bright side of things 看事情光明的一面
例：An optimist always looks on the bright side of things.
（乐观者总是看事情光明的一面。）
7.lad n. 少年
8.keep sb/sth in mind 牢记某人／某事物
例：Keep the saying in mind, "As you sow, so shall you reap."
（牢记这句俗话“：一分耕耘，一分收获。”）
9.assistant manager 襄理，助理
10.vacant a. 空缺的；无人的
vacancy n. 空缺；空房间
例：When you see the "VACANCY" sign outside of a motel, it means that there are still some rooms available.
（当你看见汽车旅馆外头打出“VACANCY” ，的告示时，那表示尚有房间可租。）
11.blurt vt. 不假思索地冲口而出
blurt out... 信口说出……
例：Don't just blurt out the first thing that comes to your mind; think before you speak.
（不要口无遮拦，想一想再说！）
12.hooker n. 妓女
=whore, prostitute
13.hockey n. 曲棍球
hockey player 曲棍球选手
14.No kidding！你在开玩笑吧！
=Are you kidding (me)?
本文地址：http://www.dioenglish.com/writing/humor/7125.html
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