赖世雄读英语笑话学英语之不带颜色的通俗笑话(4)：先享受，后付款(双语)

Unit 4 Play Now, Pay Later 先享受，后付款

Jack the playboy had explored every corner of the world and dallied with many women, but in Hong Kong he finally encountered a professional girl who left him far more than fond memories.
花花公子杰克喜欢到世界各地探险，和许多妓女风流，但在香港，他终于遇到一名职业神女，这名神女留给他的不止是温柔的回忆而已。

First, he consulted a British doctor. “God Lord!” exclaimed the medic, “you’ve got more venereal diseases than a medical textbook. I’m afraid we’re going to have to amputate.”
首先他请教了一名英国医生“。我的天啊！”医生叫道“，你所患的性病比一本医学教科书还要丰富，恐怕我们必须把你的东西切除掉。”

Horrified, the playboy sought out an American specialist, who shook his head gravely and said, “Sorry, son; if we don’t amputate your member, the disease will spread to your other organs.”
花花公子心生恐惧，便找了一位美国专科医师帮忙，但那名专科医师表情凝重地摇头说“：对不起，小兄弟，如果我们不切除那活儿，病毒将会感染到其他器官。”

Desperately, the swinger consulted a Chinese herbalist. The wise old man examined the patient carefully and nodded his head sagely. “I know your problem,” he said. “You play with bad girl,she very sick, now you very sick.”
那名风流公子走投无路，便向一位中医请教。这位充满智慧的老先生仔细检查病人后煞有介事地点头说道：“我知道你的问题。你和坏女人乱搞，她的性病很严重，你现在的病情也很严重。”

“Doctor, the British and American doctors told me my pride and joy would have to be cut off...”
“大夫，英国和美国的医生都说我的东西必须要切除……”

“These Western doctors, all they want to do is cut, cut, cut, and charge big money.”
“这些西医所做的就是切，切，切，然后收一大笔钱。”

“You mean I don’t need surgery?!” exclaimed the young man joyously.
“你意思是我可以不用动外科手术？！”年轻人喜出望外地问道。

“Don’t you worry,” said the ancient practitioner. “You go home, relax, wait two, three weeks, pecker fall off by himself.”
“别担心，”老中医师说“：回家去，好好休息一阵，等二三个星期后，那活儿会自己掉下来。”

英语知识点解说：

1.playboy n. 花花公子

2.explore vt. 探测；探讨

3.dally vi. 戏弄；玩弄（与 with 并用）
dally with women 玩弄女人

4.encounter vt. 碰见；遭遇
例：A hero never withdraws when he encounters difficulties.
（英雄遇到困难时绝不退缩。）

5.fond a. 温柔的；喜爱的
be fond of... 喜欢……
例：John is fond of singing.（约翰很喜欢唱歌。）
John enjoys singing.

6.consult vt. 请教 ；救诊；查阅 & vi. 商量
consult sb 请教某人
consult with sb 与某人商量
例：Consult the dictionary to find the meaning.
（翻翻字典查看意思是什么。）
I refuse to answer any questions until I consult with my lawyer.
（在和我的律师商量之前，我拒绝回答任何问题。）

7.venereal a. 性病的
a venereal disease 性病，简称（V.D.）

8.amputate vt. 切除

9.句型分析：
Horrified, the playboy...
=Being horrified, the playboy...
由于恐惧，这位花花公子就……

10.seek out... 找出……
seek 的三态为：seek, sought, sought。
例：You must seek out the answer to the question.
（你必须自己设法找出问题的解答。）

11.specialist n. 专科医师；专家

12.gravely ad. 表情凝重地
grave a. 严重的；重大的
show grave concern over sb 对某事表严重关切
例：The mayor showed grave concern over the economy but didn't do anything about it.
（市长对于经济状况表示严重关切，但却无任何作为！）

13.swinger n. 浪荡子

14.herbalist n. 草药郎中
herbal a. 草的；草本的
herbal medicine 草药

15.nod vi. 点头；打瞌睡（与 off 并用）
例：David tended to nod off at work.
（大卫工作时容易打瞌睡。）

16.sagely ad. 以圣贤人的态度；煞有介事地
sage n. 圣贤人

17.surgery n. 外科手术（不可数）
perform surgery on... 对……开刀
=perform an operation on...

18.joyous a. 高兴的（=joyful）

19.practitioner n. 执业医生或律师

20.pecker n. 男性生殖器（俚）

本文末句正式写法如下：
If you go home, relax and wait two or three weeks, your pecker will fall off by itself.

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